Browsing tag: quotes

  • August 31, 2017

    A Change Will Do you Good

    We have all heard it the phrase.  But change is hard.  Even so, it can be a good thing.   And it can be so simple.  What I have found does wonders, is simply a little change of scenery.

     

    I have more free time on my hands right now than I have had in years.    I still find myself getting bogged down.   I struggle hard to find focus.   I have a to-do list a mile long.   I have a tasks-started-but-not-completed list two miles long.   I am so used to having the minutes of my day lined out for me that when I have hours unbooked, I can feel a bit, overwhelmed.

    For so much of my life I have lived by the mantra “work hard, play hard.”   I worked to play.   I loved my jobs most of the time, but I loved vacations even more.    I always found the transition from work to play very easy, because I was usually a little fried by the time I walked out of the newsroom, got onto a plane or loaded in the car to head somewhere fun.   I felt I earned the time off and didn’t have much trouble unplugging from the world I gave most of my life to.   Now?   Now that I have more open space before me, I find I have to work a little harder at it.

     

    There is a bit of guilt scheduling entire days to myself.    There is also the fact I work for myself now, out of my home, so even though I live steps from the beauty of the beach, I am always steps away from piles of work I could be getting to.    Oh yeah, and there are no paid vacation days anymore.    I need to stay plugged in to a certain extent to pay the bills.   All that said, I know our brains need vacations from our every day lives, no matter what those lives are filled with.   That’s where a change of scenery can do wonders.

    I’ve spent the last week up in Tahoe.   I’ve done a little work here and there, but the piles and massive to-do lists…I left at home.   I brought abbreviated versions with me, which has left me ample opportunity for hikes, lake-time and exploring new territory.     And at the end of the week, guess what?

    I find I have more focus.   I am actually a little eager to take on the to-do list upon my return.

     

    It wasn’t discipline or working harder that got me here, though.  It was getting away.   It was the peace of a mountain hike, the serenity of paddling into a crystal clear lake cove, and the awe of discovering a new body of water to float in.     My psyche got to explore some out-of-the-ordinary sensory sensations, and I feel renewed because of that.

    Look, I know we can’t always run off to Tahoe, or some other vacation spot for a week at a time.   But we all live around nature in some form or fashion and there are corners of it we spend little time around or have left unexplored altogether.    Maybe this week find a hike you have been meaning to check out and do it.    Or a beach you drive by and long to pay a visit.   How about a patio spot for lunch, or a coffee shop that seems so quaint as you quickly grab your latte to go?   Can you carve out a couple of hours this week to explore one of them.    We’re looking for a tiny detour off the beaten path here.  A simple change of scenery.

     

    I know what you’re thinking.   You have too much on your plate.   You have to too much to get done.  Here’s the deal though:   If you don’t take the time to reset the machinery now and then, your efficiency suffers.   And sometimes the best use of your time, is to take a little of it for yourself.    It’s good to work hard, play hard.  But try turning it around.    Try a little easy play and my hunch is the work gets a little easier too.

     

    “Not all those who wander are lost.’  J.R.R. Tolkien 

     

  • August 10, 2017

    Test flights

    There is something magical happening right now on the central coast.   I’m talking about the show Mother Nature is putting on via the pelicans that are hanging out along our coastline.

    Over the years I have observed they arrive right around tax time…a beautiful sign that summer is just around the corner.   They seem to me like old friends who come to visit for summer fun, and they spark in me a sense of play.   If there is activity at sea, they will be out.  If there is a gathering for sunset, they seem to enjoy a pass or two to check out the action.   And if they whales are migrating, they will seize the opportunity for a little feeding frenzy.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    While there is little information out there about baby pelicans in training, the past few years I have noticed August seems to be a great month to catch the antics.    The first time I noticed it was in San Simeon. when I was watching a flock of pelicans apparently enjoying an evening feast just offshore.  I thought the anchovies must be running or something to prompt the activity, not only by pelicans, but seagulls as well.   Upon closer inspection, however, I noticed it wasn’t seagulls mixed in with the big-billed pelicans, but young pelicans.   Furthermore, it didn’t appear any of the larger birds where actually catching anything, but training their young-in’s how to feed.

    I was mesmerized.   The larger birds would fly a pattern and all the little ones would soon follow.  But instead of hitting the water at full speed, they would begin their descent, then kind of panic just as the surface grew close, throw out their brakes (wings) and paddle their feet as if to say “Whoa, whoa, WHOOOOAAA!   Could I be seeing what I thought?   Was I watching a pelican training school?  It was so adorable and amusing.

    According to Boston University, while birds are born with the instinct to fly, they need a little help honing their skills.    Just as humans are born with the instinct to walk, parents help toddlers along, often with one parent holding the child and encouraging them to step forward while another parent stands a short distance away with their arms open ready to reward them and offer a sense of safety.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    “Similar to humans, birds are born with this same instinct, mainly for the action of flight. No bird is born with the ability to fly because it takes practice.   Rather birds are trained by their parents through the power of reinforcement.”  -Nature VS Nurture/How do birds learn how to fly-Boston University

    So this practice is happening right now off beaches and bluffs up and down the central coast.   Look closely…those smaller birds flying along side the larger pelicans are not likely seagulls.    Watch as they practice flying in formation, cruising coastal wind patterns and diving for food.   It’s quite entertaining and frankly can trap me for hours as easily as Facebook or a good Netflix series.

    I’m no expert in on birds.   This is by observation only and some very crude research on-line, so I welcome anyone to offer up anything more they know about it.  All I know is it’s magical.

    So find some time one late afternoon or evening and park yourself wherever you see Pelicans gather.   (Although I’ve seen them do it at all times of day, it does seem they come out to “play” as the sun starts to sink into the afternoon sky.)   I suggest the marina in Santa Barbara, Pismo Beach, Dinasour Caves Park, Avila Beach/Port San Luis, Morro Bay, Cayucos, or San Simeon.   All work.   Then get ready to watch the show.

  • August 3, 2017

    Face the Fear

     

    I have said this and believed this for as long as I can remember.   Okay, maybe since around junior-high or high-school.    At some point I realized the rush of taking on something I was afraid of and getting to the other side, and I was hooked.   That doesn’t mean I chased that high with reckless abandon.  In fact, did so with a little less enthusiasm with each passing year.   Some of that is wisdom.    I know how bad it hurts to fall…off a horse, off a pedestal, out of love.    But with wisdom come too many fears sometimes.

    We all have fears.   Some of us more than others…maybe.   (Likely they are just different fears.)   But it is when I give into those fears that I feel most constricted and unhappy.   Usually I get to a point of discontent that is deep enough that I have no choice…I have to face them head on and move toward them, and what’s next.

    I believe we are motivated too much as adults, not by the pursuit of pleasure and happiness, but by  pain and discontent.   It is only when a situation gets painful enough that we will really push through our fears.  If only we could change that, we could avoid so much of that pain.   Fears are paralyzing.

    I keep talking, lately, about living more like our child-selves…those little versions of ourselves who liked to build sand-sculptures at the beach and didn’t care if we got a sand wedgie in the process, or stripped off our clothing as quickly as possible to jump into a body of water, without a thought about what we looked like in our bathing suits.   If only we could think more about what makes our hearts soar, rather than how they could get hurt….

    Kids don’t think so much about avoiding pain.   They want, and they ask for their object or experience of desire with every expectation the answer could be a yes.    And even if told no, they are likely to ask again.   They head into experiences the same way, with every expectation that this is going to be FUN!

    Marianne Williamson summarized it well in her book Illuminata:

     

    “Children are happy because they don’t yet have a file in their minds called “All the Things That Could Go Wrong.’  Marianne Williamson/Illuminata”

    What I challenge you to do when feeling stuck, or even paralyzed by fear is indulge the beast for a bit.  Go ahead and make the list of all that could go wrong.    Done.  You indulged the ugly creature that lurks in your brain.   Now, list all that could go right, and what may happen in your world if it did.   Zero in on those.   If even one or two of those happened that went well…imagine how you would feel.   Lean into that.   I know for sure it’s almost always worth the risk to head toward those potentials.   

    It may be big (leaving a job, applying for a job, falling in love….) or small (tackling a cleaning project, attending a new fitness class at the gym)…but what fear could you face today?  Be brave my friends.  I am so confident you will feel lighter and freer when you get to the other side.

  • July 6, 2017

    Shred the Gnar

    I keep being reminded to play like a kid. A couple of vivid examples happened in just the last week.

    Gordon, my fiancé, and I love boating up in Lake Tahoe. The first summer after I left KSBY we spent most of our summer days floating on the crystal clear blue of that beautiful body of water. He was recovering from surgery and I was recovering from my latest stint in television news. This summer we are both working more, have our condo up there rented out much more, and are both wondering whether taking the boat out of storage and docking it for the season makes sense. We have been dealing with a bit of option paralysis.

    Last week we were still debating whether to head north and get the “job” done. Gordon called Leon, the free-spirited owner of the boat storage facility who he had talked to several times already that week to say he had changed his mind again. We would wait until after the 4th of July weekend. Here’s how the conversation went from there.

    Leon: “Dude, too late. I already pulled your boat down, got the guys working on it right now. Time to Shred the Gnar Dude.”

    Gordon; “What is Shred the Gnar?”

    Leon: “Dude, are you that old? It’s 4th of July weekend. You know, get out there and get to it. Break some shit.”

    Gordon asked how soon I could be ready and said we were heading north.

    “It’s time to Shred the Gnar.” He told me.

    After a quick inquiry from me, followed by a google search, I learned “Shred the Gnar” has to do with extreme sports…snowboarding, skateboarding, surfing or skiing but to me it’s a fun new commandment to quit taking life so seriously and seize the day. It’s become my new favorite saying for the summer.

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=shred%20the%20gnar&defid=6348075

    https://www.quora.com/What-does-shred-some-gnar-mean

    We were back in Shell Beach for the actual 4th where for some reason we tend to steer clear of the crowds and craziness and watch the fireworks from a friends house. But this year, we opted to get on our bikes and ride right down into the chaos. Gordon, his son, a couple of friends and I ended dancing our way down to waters edge, lying on our backs with the fireworks exploding right over us. I mean you felt each explosion and it was fantastic! Not quite tearing down a powder-covered mountain, but Shredding the Gnar in our own middle-aged way.

    I got to thinking about how easy it can be to take the easy path to summer and life in general. It takes a little extra coordination to load bikes, boats, or toys of any kind and actually use them to PLAY (you know, like you did as kids) but it’s so worth it.

    As we were riding home (must faster than cars caught in traffic) and my legs and lungs were burning heading up the hill out of Pismo Beach I got to thinking. How many 4th of July celebrations have I missed because I was reading the late news. I remembered how for the last couple we weren’t sure Gordon would even be able to ride like this again. I was overcome with such a sense of gratefulness we made the effort. And a commitment to continue playing like a child as often as possible. Life is short, unpredictable and far too serious for too often.

    So Shred the Gnar Baby!

  • June 29, 2017

    Rediscover Rather than Find Yourself

    I had this saying taped to my mirror for years.   It is so wise and so true, and could make our paths to enlightenment so much easier.    We all, at some point or another, struggle to find answers..   We buy self-help books.  We take classes.  We join groups.  But I believe Glenda the Good Witch in the Wizard of Oz was right.

    We had them all along.

    We just forget as we grow up and life happens to us.

    I think one of the best ways to be reminded of our inner wisdom, to solve a problem that’s been nagging at us, or to help ourselves make a decision we’ve been struggling with, is get outside and play.

    This past week week I was struggling a bit with business plans, projections and projects.   The weekend had arrived and I was feeling like I should spend much of Saturday at my desk again.   But it was a perfect summer day on the Central Coast, and friend of mine asked me to go to a popular beach a short drive from home.  She proposed, however, we do it a bit differently than usual.  Instead of jumping in the car and fighting traffic and parking when we got there, she suggested we ride our bikes.   It was an easy sell as I had my 11-year-old niece and her little friend coming over for the afternoon.

    We packed up the backpacks, bungee-d down the beach chairs and peddled off.   Immediately I recalled the memory peddling off for summer adventures when I was a kid:  It mattered not our destination or timeframe, the minute we made it to the end of our own street, we were headed for summer fun.

    That’s how it felt as we took off for the beach last weekend.   We were able to take a bike path the whole way, so had no worries about traffic, parking or navigating intersections.   We were just cruising.      I looked at my niece and her friend and was moved by their enthusiasm to play.   When I had asked them earlier about riding with us, they simply said “sure” and went to get their bikes.  They had no questions about destinations or plans.   I watched my friend Tarren who is a successful attorney, mother and grandmother peddle away, and saw instead little beach girl enjoying the same sense of adventure.  Her bike was packed up with all the essentials for a fun day at the beach.   I was grinning ear to ear watching it all.  Feeling it all.

    We got the beach, locked our bikes up (just that ritual brought back an inner reminder of childhood adventures) and headed for the surf.   My niece and her playmate couldn’t get their shoes, hats and clothes off fast enough to run to the water.   I watched them jump the waves, squeal and laugh in the surf for hours.  And as I felt the familiar comfort of the warm sand below me, the hot sun above and a light ocean breeze keeping the temperature just right, I thought, “This is the kind of joy we are born with.”  This is the kind of joy we need to soak up at every opportunity.    Even if we aren’t on summer break.

    I think we need to quit trying to figure things out so much and remember what Mom told us when we got cranky, were testing her patience, or whined that there was NOTHING to do.   Remember?   Mine would snap: “Go outside and Play!”  I am learning more each day the wisdom in those words.

     

    Find a way to go play today my friends!

     

    Next week: Shredding the Gnar.

     

     

     

     

  • June 19, 2017

    Messages in the Sand: Spreading magic

    Messages in the Sand:


    Can you remember the thrill of magic? “What?” You ask. MAGIC. Most of us believed in it in some form or fashion as children. Santa Claus. The Tooth Fairy. Our imaginary friends. Coming back to you? Well can you really remember the FEEL of that magic?

    Give it a try. Can you recall that FEELING you had as a child in the days leading up to Christmas morning? Or maybe what it felt like waking up and realizing today was the day, then rushing out to the living room to see what Santa had left. There was a thrill to believing in something as magical as good old St. Nick.

    I was reminded of that feeling recently while having my coffee down at the beach not far from my home. Someone magical in my neighborhood leaves messages in the sand for those of us who will get up early enough to take them in before high tide and beach activity takes them away.

    They are so special to me they will get me out of bed long before my body is ready so that I can run down to see what words of wisdom have been left on any given day. I feel Iike a kid when I begin to rise from a deep slumber, hesitant to even open my eyes, and then it hits me: “Message in the sand! Hurry! Get up!” It feels like it did every Christmas morning long ago.

    The other day I was up especially earl before the sun and cruised down to catch the beautiful transition from night to day. I lumbered over to see the message knowing there was no real hurry as the tide was still very low and no one was up yet to mess up the artwork. I reached the viewing spot and was caught off guard to see the mystery writer in the act. My heart leapt, and there was a moment of panic that I had ruined the magic. I felt exactly like I had caught Santa Claus in the act. I backed quietly away and left him to his work.

    I now know who creates the inspiration for all of us in the beachside community and that’s okay because his messages are still so much fun to get each morning. But that morning I realized the impact a random act of kindness can have on people. The sand-writer has no idea who will see his work each morning, nor does he ask for any recognition. He does it anonymously the messages he leaves behind change the trajectory of days for most who see them. It is a random act of kindness that has a magical effects.


    I don’t think we should let our efforts to create magic go by the wayside after children shed their beliefs in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and other magical figures. What random message of inspiration could you leave for someone today? It doesn’t have to be penned perfectly on a stretch of sand, but scribbled on a card or piece of paper and left on a desk, doorstep or public place. Maybe pair it with a flower or sweet treat. Our lives are so hectic these days, I can’t think of a single person who couldn’t use a little serenity delivered to them now and then. Sign it if you’d like. (Especially if you think your recipient might be inclined to be creeped out by an anonymous gesture.). But you can always leave it packaged beautifully in a public place and addressed to “the next person who uses this restroom” or ask a server to deliver it to their next client when they settle the bill. The point is, to share a little magic with those who have forgotten how fun believing in it can be.